Tuesday the 12th was my 25th Birthday! Looking back on my 25 years I have to say I have had a pretty charmed life. To keep things simple here is what I know, and what I have learned.
- It is ok to be me. Even if I am a loud, introverted extrovert, obnoxious question asker who has always had acne (and always will) and is one of the most stubborn people you will ever meet. Here’s the thing… Being a introverted extrovert has taught me that I can love to dance, talk a lot and be social, but I am not the person who will always be out, and I know when it’s time to walk away from a situation. I like my own time and doing things alone is ok with me. I ask a lot of questions, and yes I am sure I have annoyed people at times, but I am smarter and I understand things very well, because I listen when people give me answers. I have always had acne. No shock to people close to me, but others may not know. Since I was in 6th grade I have seen a doctor for some sort of acne issue and I have come to the realization that it will never go away. It has made me a humble person and when someone gives me a complement I accept it, but will never let it get to my head. I am imperfect and I will never judge someone based on their appearance. I know from personal experience that it is something completely out of your hands, sometimes it hurts physically (in my case) and it is better to focus your energy on becoming a better person inside than the way you look. Being stubborn can be a negative thing sometimes, but I like the fact that I have a backbone and I love myself. I know who I am, what I stand for, and if someone tells me I can’t do something or I will not succeed in something I want to do I can brush them off and make it happen. I will be successful and will work hard for everything I have in life so I can say I earned it. I was not put on this earth to live off someone else and I want to make my own money, career decisions and life choices.
- Everyone you meet is not meant to be your friend forever. I have a very small group of people in my life that I consider best friends. Most have been in my life for 5+ years and others have been in my life since I was a little kid. I grew up in a small city in Northern California, moved to San Diego at 19, to south Texas at 21 and now I am back in northern California for the time being. I have met people in each place that were friends to me at the time and were there to hang out with, but now I don’t really talk to except for on social media, and some I don’t talk to at all. In each place I have met a friend I’ll have for life, but not everyone is meant to be there forever. We are all human and need someone to talk to at times, but I find keeping my circle small means no drama. There is no competition and I can devote my time and energy to being the best friend possible to the friends I have, who have my back. Quality over quantity is my motto for a lot of things in life, friends included.
- Sometimes your life goes in a direction you never expected, and it’s still amazing! When I was a kid I said I wanted to get married, but as I got older I realized that a piece of paper and a title was not necessary to make me happy or fully committed to another person. A relationship is based on trust and communication and if you have the two then your relationship can last. It is about you and the other person trusting each other, communicating about life choices and big decisions, and love. You can not have a great relationship with love alone. As humans we can love as easily as we can hate it seems, so using communication and being realistic can help you determine if something is worth making last. Sometimes you just have that “connection” with certain people whether they are good or bad for you. Don’t get me wrong, I am a hopeless romantic, but I am also a realist. I want to be treated right and trust someone with my whole heart, but I am not so blind that if something were harmful to my well being I would know when to walk away, as much as it may hurt. I am lucky in the fact that I do have a loving husband who I trust and can talk to like a best friend. I have it all in my relationship and I will work to make our love last, because yes, a relationship takes hard work. I am married now and never thought I would be, but life takes us in crazy directions. The thing I know most about this life I have lived is that I love every part of it and every twist and turn I have experienced. I am a better person because of the hard times I have had, and I know I am resilient.
- Think positive, be positive, live positive. This is pretty cliché but it is SO effective! If you start everyday thinking “I hate my job, I hate my life, I hate where I live,” then yes, you will be miserable! Simple as that. I am naturally a pessimist and it is very easy for me to look at a situation and go strait to the negative, but the older I get the more I realize it is easier to take a shitty situation and think, “ok, this happened, now how can I fix the problem, or how can I make this better?” If you immediately go strait to the negative then you will bitch and complain and find every reason to blame someone else rather than figuring things out, and moving forward. A positive attitude and drive to be a better you will take you so far in life. Every successful person has heard a no, but they don’t rest on it and never try again. They positively move forward and achieve their goals in another way.
There are so many other life lessons I have learned, but if I live my life remembering these 4 key things I will continue to be happy. The next 25 years will come with their own challenges and changes, but I am so excited to live them and learn more about myself, life and love!
Cheers to 25 years, and cheers to 25 more!